I’m sensitive to the way people talk to each other. What one says and how one says it means a lot to me. I read volumes into this type of thing. So when BNO says certain things in certain ways, I believe I know what he is trying to communicate. Sometimes, though, he’s really not being that deep. He’s just being him. And then he goes and says something that I really hate. Maybe it was the truth or maybe his version of it. But I do my own personal reading of what he meant. I read between the lines of his words and his tone of voice. If I read into it something that I don’t like, I just might get heated. That’s when I have to run away for a time. Not far, maybe just to the bedroom with a book or magazine in hand, or maybe to the store for window shopping. Or maybe to the library, my fav place. The library is so quiet and smells like old wood and old paper. It’s filled with so many things to read and ways to lose myself. It’s very calming to me.
The thing about this running is that it pisses BNO off. He hates it when I run.
Before you all start thinking that those folks must be crazy up in they house, let me say that we ain’t crazy! We ain’t dys-func-tion-al up in here! Ain’t no Frankie and Neffe up in this house! I hate the word dYsfunctional because it sounds too much like it looks. Don’t it LOOK stupid on paper? So harsh looking with the letter Y in there! Plus people like to throw it around so as to elevate themselves over you, the “dysfunctional” one! No, there’s no dysfunction here. There’s only living life. I prefer using the word “issues” because it sounds better. You can’t really say it in a hard, harsh accusatory condemning way, plus it looks pretty on paper. Those two SS look so feminine!
BNO and I have our issues. He likes to say what he wants without biting his tongue. I like to be very careful of others’ feelings before I speak. So when these types of misunderstandings happen, I run away for a while. Not all the time though. Running gives me the space to get myself back together mentally, to cool off and come down off the high horse. I can get a little snobbish about certain things. When I run away, I have time to try to see things from BNO’s perspective. Sometimes I agree with his perspective after all, and sometimes I don’t. Isn’t it interesting how we tend to expect people to be exactly like we are? I’m a sensitive soul, and I tend to expect BNO to say only what I would say, the way I would say it. When he says it the way HE would, I don’t like it too much. Hmmmm….
So I run away. Sometimes I run away in my car or I run away by taking a walk. This is a good one, because I get a little exercise in. By now you’re probably wondering about us. Well, don’t you judge me, or BNO!! I’m aware that there are some couples who NEVA have any problems in their relationships. They just go smooth sailing every day and every minute–they all lovey dovey and ish! Good for you! 😉 But for the rest of us, we have to put in work in our relationships! Things may get a little rocky, but the make up time is so sweet!!! Maybe we breaking up just to make up! I don’t know, y’all! I’m just trying to live! Imma go get some ice cream right now, or a piece of cheese! Help me Jesus!
I bet you all have your own ways of dealing with your mate when they do things that you don’t like! Share!